Post by meldrew on Feb 21, 2014 10:02:37 GMT 1
Police work must be entertaining as well as dangerous.
Recently, a female police officer arrested Patrick LAWRENCE, a 22 year
old male, who was caught fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of
the night.
The next day, at the Horsham Court (Victoria, Australia), LAWRENCE was
charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public
intoxication.
LAWRENCE explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way
home from a drinking session, he decided to stop.
"You know how a pumpkin can be soft and squishy inside... well, there
was no one around for miles - or at least I thought there wasn't anyone
around..." he stated.
LAWRENCE went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road,
picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a
hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his pressing need.
"I s'pose I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident
embarrassment.
In the process of doing the deed, LAWRENCE failed to notice an
approaching police car and was unaware of his audience, until Senior
Constable Brenda TAYLOR approached him.
'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,' said Senior Constable
TAYLOR,
'I walked up to LAWRENCE - and he's just banging away at this
pumpkin...'
Senior Constable TAYLOR went on to describe what happened when she
approached LAWRENCE...
"I said; 'Excuse me sir, why are you having sex with a pumpkin?"
"LAWRENCE froze.
He was clearly very surprised that I was there, but then he looked me
straight in the eye and said,
'A pumpkin? poo - is it midnight already?"
The court (and the magistrate) could not contain their mirth.
The Geelong Post wrote an article describing this as 'The best
come-back line ever.'
Recently, a female police officer arrested Patrick LAWRENCE, a 22 year
old male, who was caught fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of
the night.
The next day, at the Horsham Court (Victoria, Australia), LAWRENCE was
charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public
intoxication.
LAWRENCE explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way
home from a drinking session, he decided to stop.
"You know how a pumpkin can be soft and squishy inside... well, there
was no one around for miles - or at least I thought there wasn't anyone
around..." he stated.
LAWRENCE went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road,
picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a
hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his pressing need.
"I s'pose I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident
embarrassment.
In the process of doing the deed, LAWRENCE failed to notice an
approaching police car and was unaware of his audience, until Senior
Constable Brenda TAYLOR approached him.
'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,' said Senior Constable
TAYLOR,
'I walked up to LAWRENCE - and he's just banging away at this
pumpkin...'
Senior Constable TAYLOR went on to describe what happened when she
approached LAWRENCE...
"I said; 'Excuse me sir, why are you having sex with a pumpkin?"
"LAWRENCE froze.
He was clearly very surprised that I was there, but then he looked me
straight in the eye and said,
'A pumpkin? poo - is it midnight already?"
The court (and the magistrate) could not contain their mirth.
The Geelong Post wrote an article describing this as 'The best
come-back line ever.'
