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Post by danceswithruskies on Jun 30, 2010 15:14:59 GMT 1
Religion and Genealogy
A little girl asked her mother, 'How did the human race appear?'
The mother answered, 'God made Adam and Eve and they had children And so was all mankind made.' Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.
The father answered, 'Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.'
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, 'Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?' The mother answered, 'Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.'
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Post by danceswithruskies on Jul 1, 2010 3:48:35 GMT 1
Strange how men and women do stuff--
Some examples are below--
Men discovered COLORS and invented PAINT, Women discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP.
Men discovered the WORD and invented CONVERSATION, Women discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP.
Men discovered GAMBLING and invented CARDS, Women discovered CARDS and invented WITCHERY.
Men discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD, Women discovered FOOD and invented DIET.
Men discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE, Women discovered LOVE and invented MARRIAGE.
Men discovered TRADING and invented MONEY, Women discovered MONEY and invented SHOPPING.
Thereafter Men have discovered and invented a lot of thingsā¦
While Women STUCK to shopping.
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Post by danceswithruskies on Jul 28, 2010 6:09:24 GMT 1
Honey..I want a Divorce!
A married couple are driving along a highway doing 60mph, the wife behind the wheel.
Her husband suddenly looks over at her and says, "Honey, I know we've been married for 20 years, but I want a divorce."
The wife says nothing, but slowly increases speed to 70 mph.
He then says, "I don't want you to try to talk me out of it, because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and she's a better lover than you are."
Again the wife stays quiet, but speeds up as her anger increases.
"I want the house," he insists, pressing his luck.
Again the wife speeds up to eighty mph.
He says, "I want the car, too," but she just drives faster and faster.
By now she's up to ninety mph. "All right," he says, "I want the bank accounts, and all the credit cards, too."
The wife slowly starts to veer toward a bridge.
This makes him a bit nervous, so he says, "Isn't there anything you want?"
The wife says, "No, I've got everything I need."
"Oh, really," he says, "So what have you got?"
Right before they slam into the wall at a 100 mph, the wife smiles and says,...
"The airbag."
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